The last week of this long term has been very tiring for a myriad of reasons. It has probably been the hardest term that I have ever had, and yet there were also very positive aspects; I learned a lot and used my management skills to sort out some things that I inherited that badly needed sorted. And it worked too! But although the end of term was pleasant I felt a bit down last night, not the euphoria that I had expected!
This could have been something to do with Jack's illness this week which I will blog about separately.
More likely it feels like an anti-climax because I have worked so hard to make everything go well, and I have reached the finish line and now I just feel so tired. In the evening Cat treated us to an ice climbing session at Xscape (now mysteriously named "Soar Intu") to celebrate the end of term, and we had a great time. I elected to spectate from the coffee bar while reading my book, which suited me just fine. The climbers all had a great but exhausting time and then we all had a convivial dinner in TGIF.
This morning I was still thinking about work a bit, and then I happened to phone Jennifer. Jennifer is always kind and pleasant to me, but during the course of the phone call I realised that I have been incredibly neglectful of her recently. She was in very close contact with me during the difficult time I had in February, and as soon as I felt a bit better what did I do? I stopped phoning so often. I felt so ashamed of myself and hot tears started sliding out of the corners of my eyes, which was strange because I cry very, very rarely. I can only describe it as a feeling of incredible sadness.
As soon as I got off the phone I texted an apology and needless to say received a kind response which I did not deserve. So I am going to spend this much anticipated spring break taking a long hard look at myself and trying to get my priorities right. I am lucky enough to have some great people in my life so I should appreciate them.
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