Goodbye 2019

Just a very quick wee blog post to sign off from 2019. We’re having a family Hogmanay at home and I’m feeling very cosy and happy. What with recent events we didn’t want to go out this year. Today is my 57th birthday and, for the first time ever, I had to work out what age I am - no doubt due to the high number! We have had a peaceful and pleasant end to the year; Margaret came round yesterday afternoon for a cup of tea, and then James produced a bottle of wine! It was great to see her and catch up on news. This morning I was showered with attention, thoughtful gifts, flowers, messages and a lovely phone call from Jamie - by 11a.m. in Scotland it was already New Year’s Day in New Zealand. Then we went down to Biggar where I celebrated a joint birthday lunch with Bill, who turned 80 on Boxing Day. There were eight of us and it was a very happy occasion. Cat arrived back from Canada later in the afternoon and there was a flurry of late Christmas gifts to and from her before we had dinner. Anyway I shall get on with the festivities - happy Hogmanay from Casa Anderson!

Duddingston Loch

Last night Ally and I were introduced to a new board game by David and Chanel. It is called Betrayal at House on the Hill, and is a proper strategy game, much more complicated than board games I have played before. Luckily our experts David and Chanel were on hand to explain it, and it was good fun. In the first part the players construct the house with it’s different rooms and tasks, and then suddenly and unpredictably second part - the Haunting - begins. It’s genuinely quite exciting.
The festive season continued today with a visit to Edinburgh to meet up with Janet, Peter and Anne at the picturesque Sheep Heid Inn beside Duddingston Loch. Despite being at the end of December, the weather was positively balmy, the sun was shining on the Loch and it was hard to imagine the skating minister from the famous painting. We went for a walk before lunch; I took the low road and James, Ally, Davie and Chanel took the high road right up to the top of Arthur’s Seat.
We had a lovely round table at the Inn and had a most pleasant meal and afternoon in great company.
Jennifer messaged me to let me know that the writer and artist Alasdair Gray died this morning. I was sad to hear it; he was a delightful and very talented man. I met him at Aye Write on 12th April 2014 and I blogged about it the next day; it was a very special experience because he had met my Mum in 1952 and remembered the occasion.

Our But an’ Ben

To quote Paw Broon, “We’ve aye wanted a but an’ ben in the country.” In fact James and I have talked about purchasing a holiday home on and off for many years, but have never found the right place at the right price at the right time. We considered quite seriously buying a house in Brodick on Arran about twenty years ago, but it was far too much of a project and our plans went on the back burner for a while. Occasionally we discussed the subject, so it was never completely forgotten. Over the last couple of years, with the boys independent (more or less) and retirement ahead, we started contemplating the idea again. By this time we had become very interested in Ullapool, a wee town in Wester Ross of which we are both extremely fond. We had visited it separately as children, then as a young couple, then many times with our children and with the hill-walking club. We love all of the far north west, but at almost exactly a four hour drive from door to door, Ullapool is a reasonable distance from Glasgow for a weekend trip or longer. From there we can easily strike further north to Lochinver and beyond.
We scrutinised the estate agents’ websites and even registered with the local estate agent. We came close to bidding on a house in West Shore Street but it was not only very expensive and in need of refurbishment, but also too big for us - it crystallised our thoughts that (for now at least) we are looking for a holiday house and not a permanent home up north. And then a couple of weeks ago, I think about the 11th December, things started to move rather fast. The estate agent emailed us with details of a house in Morefield, a quiet area about 15 minutes walk from the centre of Ullapool. A white-painted detached cottage with a view over the river to the sea and mountains beyond, it’s in walk in condition and we really liked the look of it. We went to view it on Tuesday 17th December, by which time a closing date had been set for 11 a.m. on 19th December.
The house is great, we loved everything about it and had to think quickly. After much discussion in the Ceilidh Place we contacted our lawyer Ian, and our bid went in at 10 a.m. on the 19th. I was out later for coffee with Karen when James messaged me to say, “Just got a call from Inverness. We have bought a house.” We haven’t bought a house for more than thirty years so it’s all a bit of a shock - but hopefully a good one. Roll on 2020 - all being well we should get the keys in February.

Christmas around the world

Christmas Day will be over here in Glasgow in a few minutes. Jamie is well into Boxing Day in New Zealand where it is already lunch time. Cat and her family however are still in the middle of Christmas Day in Vancouver in Canada; it’s only four o’clock in the afternoon there. However we have all celebrated the day in our different parts of the world and have thought of each other and exchanged messages.
We had a lovely family day here. First of all Ally and Davie and Chanel opened their Christmas stockings and I think that they all felt that Santa had been good to them! James and I also received a Christmas stocking to share which was very thoughtful of Santa. We had carefully planned the timings for dinner so the turkey went into the oven at 9.45 a.m.
Marjory, Forrest, Jenny, Neil and Lucy came round in the morning for champagne and sausage rolls and we all had a nice chat. We watched the Queen’s speech at 3 pm and then served our Christmas dinner, which went very smoothly - everything was ready at the right time! Before we started eating we raised our glasses and drank a toast to Grandma. This has been our first Christmas without her - in my case for thirty-four years (since we got married) and for James and the boys, the first Christmas without her in all of their lives. We ate hugely but there was still lots left, so there will be plenty of leftovers for at least several days. We moved through to the lounge and played a card game called Codenames which was really interesting and challenging; I loved it. And later James and I went out for a walk to aid our digestion. The streets were unusually quiet as we strolled along. It’s a funny old day, Christmas; both strange and familiar. I’m glad that it has gone well.

It’s the night before Christmas

Yesterday we had an unexpected but very welcome invitation from Marjory and Forrest, who had spare tickets for a Christmas concert at the GRCH. So we happily went along and were treated to an excellent evening of festive songs. As well as an orchestra, choir and dancers, there were two excellent principal singers; Laura Tebbutt and Tim Howar. Tim Howar is the current (although not original) lead singer of Mike and the Mechanics and both singers have had many lead roles in London’s West End. Their voices were amazing. Soon we were all singing along, it was a great evening.
And here we are on Christmas Eve. This afternoon we went to see It’s a Wonderful Life at the Grosvenor Cinema in Ashton Lane, and as ever it was truly lovely. Back at home we ate more roasted chestnuts and chatted while watching Christmas number ones on an old edition of Top of the Pops.

Pasta and cocktails

Today we had our annual Christmas celebration lunch with Heather and Ewan. It was great to see them and we dined at the excellent Italian Kitchen in Ingram Street. As usual it was a fun occasion with good friends, and as usual a selection of our young ones (Ally, Davie, Chanel and Andrew) joined us afterwards at Metropolitan for drinks. This year a wide variety of cocktails were quaffed, including the strangely scented and lilac coloured rum-based “Parma Violet” and the foamy white “Breakfast Martini” which contains, among other ingredients, gin, marmalade and egg white.
We chatted about all sorts of things but my favourite conversation started when Andrew suddenly declared that pasta quills are the most boring pasta shapes. David was shocked and forcefully countered that tagliatelle was indubitably the most boring pasta. A lively and lengthy discussion ensued! James and I and Heather and Ewan headed home in the early evening while the younger folk continued on to more hostelries. It has been a lovely day.

Christmas traditions

Christmas won’t be the same this year without Grandma, however we feel that it will be comforting to celebrate it in our usual way. We have ordered the turkey from the butcher just the way she liked, and the tree is decorated with the star that James made in 1985 on top. We will meet up with Marjory, Forrest and all the young ones on Christmas morning, and then have a quiet traditional Christmas dinner at home. It’s all about family.

Glasgow is full of Christmas lights and music and I have wrapped all the presents. This week we went with Alison and Bill to the Oran Mor pantomime, which this year is “Dixie Whittington and the Hamecoming.” It was very funny and Dave Anderson was excellent as the pantomime dame. We noticed Robbie Coltrane in the audience, he didn’t look in the best of health. We went to Matilda’s for coffee and a chat afterwards. Then this evening we went the GFT to see James’ favourite film -  Elf * - with David and Chanel. It is such a lovely film and now we are back at home eating roasted chestnuts and drinking tea.

* Elf is actually James’ equal favourite film with Apocalypse Now and Lawrence of Arabia. 

Bittersweet

It has been a strange week. Although Jamie came home for the sad reason of Grandma’s funeral, it has still been lovely to have him at home. On Sunday we all went on the Hill-walking club’s annual mince pies outing to Aberfoyle; James was keen to get some fresh air and “blow the cobwebs away.” Well the weather was so wet and blustery that it nearly blew us away let alone any cobwebs! When putting on my boots I managed to pull a muscle in my back so painfully that it’s only just getting better now, six days later. Still, the atmosphere back at the warm and cosy Faerie Inn pub was rather jolly, especially when Santa arrived. There were some young children there this year, grandchildren of Heidi and of Jean and Tom, and they were extremely sweet.
During the week I had the opportunity to spend lots of time with Jamie, as did James, Ally and Davie. There were coffees and lunches and shopping trips into town. On Tuesday, an unfeasibly wet day, James, Jamie and I decided to visit the Hill House in Helensburgh, designed by Charles Rennie Mackintosh. Amazingly none of us had ever visited it before. I was very impressed. It’s a beautifully designed family home, commissioned by the family who ran the Blackie publishing company. Recently, to combat its terrible damp problems (archaeologist Neil Oliver has compared it to an aspirin in the process of dissolving) the house has been completely encased in an amazing mesh cage. This is designed to keep it more than 70% dry from rain, while allowing it to gradually dry out over several years. There are walkways over which you can walk and look down on the top of the house. I should add that it also has a delightful coffee shop where we had lunch and  I ate a delicious Empire biscuit.
While in Scotland, Jamie also met up with a few friends, voted in the General Election, and helped us to choose our Christmas tree. It was so great to see all of my three sons together in the evenings, chatting and laughing. But of course Grandma was never far from our thoughts. The boys talked about her and reminisced about things she used to say and do. So this week has been a bittersweet mix of happy and sad. Jamie set off back to New Zealand this evening. We will miss him but look forward to seeing him again when we visit him in February.

Tribute to Grandma

This is the short speech that James wrote about Grandma, and which Jamie delivered at her funeral, adapted slightly to refer to her as “Grandma” rather than “Mum.” I am posting it here because I think that it is worth remembering. The minister made a longer speech about Grandma’s life, of which my favourite anecdote was one that she used to tell the boys; that when she was a little girl she enjoyed dancing down the steps in her school playground, pretending to be Ginger Rogers.
Here is the speech that Jamie gave:

Thank you to everyone for coming along this morning to celebrate the life of my Grandmother, Jean Anderson. I know that some of you have travelled long distances to be here. 

Thank you also, for all your cards and messages which have been a great comfort to both Uncle Forrest, my Dad James and the whole family.

Grandma always seemed to be the person who stepped forward when help was required.

While Forrest and Dad were both still very young, their grandmother moved in with them and Grandma became her carer for the next 13 years as well as bringing up her boys.

When my Grandpa, Jimmy, had heart surgery, it was Grandma who nursed him back to health, and when he required kidney dialysis she was the one who got up to make sure he had his breakfast before he set off to the hospital at 7am. and over the years she was a kind and helpful friend to many people and a loving Grandma to the six of us.

However, following the fall 2 years ago in which she broke her hip, Grandma’s mobility became restricted and she in turn needed help. For someone who always liked to help others, this was difficult, but she still found ways to be there for us and was always ready for a chat.

Just last summer my when my Dad fell off his bike, it was Grandma who provided cotton wool and Dettol and made sure that his wounds were cleaned properly. 

So she was looking after her family right to the end of her life.

I would like to express our thanks to the staff of South Lanarkshire Council Social Work and, in particular, the Home Carers from Constance Care. Without the support from the Home Carers, Grandma would not have been able to maintain her independence and stay at home for the last two years.Thanks also to the friends who visited her faithfully.

Finally, we are very grateful to the staff at Abbeyfield Extra Care in Rutherglen who welcomed Grandma in when she was no longer able to manage at home and provided a place of comfort and safety for her. It was such a relief to Forrest and my Dad to know that she was being so well looked after in her final few weeks and they tell me that they will miss the home baking from their visits!

I hope that many of you can join us after the service at The Burnside Hotel to share your memories of Grandma.

Farewell

I think that Grandma would have approved of her funeral. The family gathered at her house to wait for the funeral cars to collect us, and it reminded us of waiting there on the day of Jimmy’s funeral fourteen years ago. The service was very traditional, led by the lovely minister from Burnside Church, with hymns The Lord is my Shepherd and Dear Lord and Father of Mankind. Both of her sons and all six of her grandchildren were present. Jamie, who had arrived from New Zealand on Friday, gave a short speech on James’ behalf which focused on Grandma’s love of helping others. Forrest and the minister gave readings and then we all went back to the Burnside Hotel where we had sandwiches and cakes. Everyone chatted and told fond stories about Grandma and the old days down at Anderson’s coal yard.
By the time the last guests had left at about 3 pm we were exhausted and, back at the house, James lit the fire in the lounge, where we sat and relaxed and talked and played Trivial Pursuit. It had been a long day but I felt that we had all done our duty to Jean and said a proper farewell.

Murder Mystery

We went to see a film this evening at the luxuriously refurbished Showcase Cinema with Heather and Ewan, called “Knives Out.” Heather and I had intended to see it last week but our plans clashed with our family meeting with the minister about the funeral. When we rescheduled it for this evening the boys decided to come with us. All I knew about the film was that it’s a murder mystery starring Daniel Craig, and unlike James I do like a murder mystery. James finds them to be a waste of time and finds the inevitable twists and turns of the plot annoying.
Well, I enjoyed it! Right enough it was arrant nonsense, with a tortuously convoluted and unlikely plot. However I thought that was good fun although it would definitely have benefited from being a bit shorter. James, seated to my left, fell asleep near the beginning of the film and started snoring gently. I thought that this was very funny and turned to the person on my right * to draw their attention to this. To my surprise and amusement, that person was also asleep! Both of them woke up again, although James later ate a Minstrel sweetie and fell back to sleep with it in his mouth, causing him to choke on it and resulting in a coughing fit. Luckily I had a bottle of water with me which I passed to him. When the film ended and we emerged into the car park, chatting about it, I mentioned that James has never liked murder mysteries and we all burst out laughing. The evening was a welcome distraction from more serious matters.

* name withheld for reasons of discretion and loyalty.

Looking back and forward

So at last it is December. November was rubbish. This morning we woke to mist and thick frost. In the week after Grandma died it was very rainy but the temperature has turned much colder now. We have been busy making the arrangements for Grandma’s funeral next Saturday. We hope to give her the dignified and affectionate goodbye that she would have liked.
We have been out and about for walks, to the gym, and even to a concert of Wagner’s music at the City Halls on Thursday but it has all been overshadowed by our sadness. We just miss her so much.
This afternoon we went over to visit Heather and Ewan who are also going through such a sad time. It was lovely to see them and we went for a walk before a cosy cup of coffee with mince pies back at their house. We talked about life and how it changes and plans for the future. It’s so important to look forward as well as back. We found it very comforting to be in the supportive company of good friends who know only too well how James is feeling.
When we got home Cat was cooking the dinner and Ally, Davie and Chanel were making cocktails. They are all so full of life and enthusiasm. They are Grandma’s legacy and so is our Jamie, who will be arriving home on Friday.